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stuttgart, frustration, and all that jazz

i dehydrated myself.  well, i live in a constant state of dehydration, but you know how i get after a long day out and i’m on my way home feeling dizzy and sick, only then to realize that all i’ve had to drink is hot chocolate and coffee.  yeah, it was pretty rough.

stuttgart is two and a half hours away from here and was so lovely.  lots of shopping and lots of starbucks.

it was a fun day.

. . .

louissa, you should’ve known better.  didn’t you make the same mistake just a few months ago?… louissa, i think you’ve already learned this lesson a few times now — don’t you think you can just try to get past this?… oh louissa, how could you do this AGAIN?

i say something rude because i don’t think before i speak, my ridiculous emotions take control before i can stop them and then i feel horribly stupid, i think terribly mean and critical thoughts about others, i reply to sarcasm with complete attitude, etc.

and even though, for years now, i’ve done these things and tried to get past them, i’m still struggling.  i guess it’s a constant battle — one i’ll have to daily ask my Lord for help in.

*sigh*

life is so depressing at times.

i’m just thankful for a friend who i can talk to late at night while we do a puzzle together and we talk about struggles, overcoming weaknesses, and repentance.  yes, i’m very thankful.

. . .

although it’s only reaching 6:00 pm for you, i’m almost up to midnight.  to bed i go.

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