Frank Sinatra’s “Nice & Easy” played while we drove down that all together too well known road between potsdam and madrid.Â i was frustrated with life, i was frustrated with my response to life, i was frustrated at how i’m not doing so well at this thing called life.Â i had tears in my eyes as i stared out my window, watching the moon as it seemed to stay by my side.Â and i thought, ‘i don’t deserve much to stay by my side.‘
i have a small circle of confidants.Â i’m a quiet person concerning me and most of the time when i’m with any joe schmo,Â i try to keep conversation off of my personal life. Â but my small circle that knows me… they know me.Â they know my faults, they know my mood swings, they know the awfulness that is in me.
i’m not a good friend.Â i’m not a very good daughter.Â i can sometimes be a horrid sister.Â and i’m definitely the most imperfect child my God has ever had.
and yet it’s those friends, my family, my God — those who know me (who really know me) that continue to stay by my side.Â and all their goodness to me, the way they care… i don’t deserve it.Â but that’s what makes it so overwhelmingly wonderful, isn’t it?